Your child is under the legal drinking age, and they’re drinking alcohol. What do you do? Learning how to handle an underage drinker is as important as learning how and when to educate your child about alcohol. And here’s how you can handle it:
Step #1: Determine the Facts
How do you know your child is underage drinking? Did you catch them in the act? Did you find empty alcohol containers or see them drunk? Did a friend tell on them or was there a more legal incident?
The first step in handling the situation is determining the facts. Keep in mind that unless there is clear evidence your child was indeed consuming the alcohol, there is the possibility that they either did not consume it or do not have a drinking problem. The company they keep could be a major component in an underage drinking scenario.
Avoid jumping to conclusions. Find the facts and act accordingly.
Step #2: Talk to Them
There’s a high probability that determining or confirming the facts will involve confronting your child. You’ll have to talk to them, and how you handle the conversation will be of paramount importance. Keep these facts in mind:
- You are your child’s biggest role model. How you interact with them will reflect in how they interact with you.
- You are the parent, not the friend. If your child is underage drinking, your job is to be the authority, not their friend.
- Remain understanding and approachable. This part is tricky. Despite being the parent, it’s important to show that you understand and are approachable so that you child can still turn to you for help, no matter how much trouble they may be facing.
Step #3: Act
Uncovering an underage drinking issue and talking to your child are important steps, but acting is equally vital. Actions speak louder than words, and it’s important to take action now and in the future. Your immediate action may be to dole out discipline or introduce an alcohol treatment program if your child is suffering from a serious drinking problem. Here are some other actions to take in the future:
- Chaperone events or host parties so that you are involved.
- Hold your child accountable for their whereabouts and itineraries.
- Educate yourself regarding the reality of underage drinking on college campuses.
- Know who your child considers friends and monitor who they spend time with.
You can prevent underage drinking if you take an active interest in your child’s life. The stronger your parent-child relationship, the more resistant they will be to negative things like underage drinking and abusing addictive substances. Remember, everyone is curious. It’s not uncommon for an underage child to try alcohol out of curiosity or peer pressure. In fact, according to Too Smart to Start, about 10 percent of 12-year-olds have tried alcohol, and 70 percent of 18-year-olds have had at least one drink. Dabbling with alcohol, that’s pretty normal. But it can quickly become a dangerous and addictive situation without proper supervision, namely the harsh reality that alcohol isn’t made for kids.